Saturday, January 15, 2011

Drawing the line

Since I am trying the Top Chef Recovery Plan for two weeks instead of one, I’m saving the results post for next weekend. In the meantime, here’s a healthy eating secret that Redbook tipped me off to:
Grocery Shopping the Redbook Way (see p. 152 of the Jan. 2011 issue)
The secret is to draw a mental line down the middle of your grocery cart. Then as you shop fill up one side with produce and the other with everything else. According to the article by Karen Asp, people who do this tend to buy “102 percent more produce” and way less junk food! (152)
I put this tip to the test; I went to the store, drew my mental line and filled up the cart. Only thing I forgot is my camera, blast it. (That’s why I unloaded the groceries on my kitchen table for the photo.) As you can see by the pic, this method worked for me. I feel like there’s so much more fresh food in my kitchen and refrigerator than ever. But it’s not just beneficial to me. My kids benefit by getting more fruits and veggies in their diet too. And my kids like it! They were thrilled to eat the Clementines—which they call, “baby oranges”—and grapes are always a favorite. Thanks, Redbook.
And now…confession time. [eyes averted, downcast, a quiver in my lip. Background music: “So you had a bad day…” by Daniel Pewter]
I had a bad, bad, bad day. And I ate…[hard swallow]…two…[direct eye contact]…brownies. [voice raises at the end of “brownies”.]
I’m so sorry, readers! I wish I could take it back.
Was it good, you ask?
No. No. No. Not at all. It was just food. I didn’t even like it. I had a craving.
How did it happen?
Our eyes met across the pantry. At first it was innocent. Just flour and cocoa and sugar. Some butter. A couple of eggs—you should’ve seen the way those eggs wore that carton. [eye contact breaks. A half smile.] But then there was a bowl and a spoon. Measuring cups. That’s when the heat turned up...350 degrees. And 18-24 minutes later, I had my mouth all over it, devouring the chocolate sin like a feral beast.
I’m so sorry. I’ll never do it again! Can you ever forgive me?
Would Padma Lakshmi forgive me?
Lakshmi: “Be patient with yourself and give yourself compassion. It’s about consistency” (117).
So Padma forgives me. But what about Alison Sweeney? Surely she’d throw me to the curb for my diet cheating, right?
Sweeney: “You didn’t fail your diet; it’s just one day in your whole life, so tomorrow, make a better choice” (116).
Alison! Oh! [hand to heart. Tear in one eye.] Thank you. I will do better. I swear. I bought brown rice and garbanzo beans to rededicate myself. No more cheating.

1 comment:

  1. That was hilarious. I feel like that every time I break my diet.


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