Monday, June 27, 2011

I Maintained This Week...

No pound-lossage this week, but I also didn't gain.

Am I sad?

No. Because, I am starting a 6 week weight-loss challenge on Thursday, sponsored by Xocai.The prizes include cash, a night's stay at Hotel Park City and breakfast for two, and more cash for the 2nd, 3rd, and honorable mention winners.

I am so psyched. I'm going to WIN IT! I'm going to lose 20 lbs and a trip to Park City! OOOH-YEAH.
Then when I swim in this pool, in  my new swim suit (size 8), I'll look awe-SOME. 

I'll fill you in on the details of the weigh in on Friday morning.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Last Chance Workout Boot Camp

It's no secret that I had the most success in weight loss with the Redbook experiment during the month of January. It was during this time that I took part in the Last Chance Workout (among other things), pumping out the pounds to the barking of Jillian Michaels and annoying tempo music. (Usually I just put it on mute and watch Buffy on my laptop at the same time. It's motivating to watch Buffy kick vampire trash while I pump 5 lbs iron and sink into blood-sucking squats.) It's a killer workout that works you from every angle and keeps your blood pumping and your heart-rate up. I really love it...when I'm not hating it.

I have a friend who came to me with resolve on her face and said, "I'm gonna do the redbook experiment. I'm going to start with January and do everything that you do. This is flattering on 2 levels. First, she must've thought I looked pretty good to volunteer for Jillian Michaels torture. Second, somehow in the last few months, I have become a source on inspiration to people. That works out nicely, b/c it helps me stay focused and motivated to continue working hard.

A few weeks later I inquired about her progress. At this point in the game, my friend shoulda been running stairs for 45 minutes a few times a week. I was dying to know how the Dreaded Stair Week was going.
"I just keep staring at week one," said my friend. Too freaked out at the intense workout and dietary changes from week one, my friend hadn't even begun.

I remember feeling that way. I remember saying things like, "I'll always be heavy because I like food too much." I remember feeling hopeless and simultaneously trying to brainwash myself into believing I was happy at the size I was 4 years ago. I believed I was happy, and on many levels I was, but health-wise, I couldn't play with my kid like I wanted. Going up the 2 flights of stairs to our apartment on the 3rd floor was a "solid workout" in my eyes. Why? Because it made me sweat and I was out of breath as I slid the key into the lock. If I had to do that while carrying a car seat too, well then I could eat 2 bowls of ice cream that day.

The truth was in the sugar-free pudding though. My health was visibly declining. In my 20's--the prime of my life!--I had become nearly diabetic.And for what? A boat of Alfredo sauce to dip my endless bread sticks in at the Olive Garden? A slice of carrot cake the size of my foot? I may not even have that foot in another decade. I was eating my way to the grave. My coffin would lie under 6 feet of Wendy's bacon cheeseburgers and custard-filled doughnuts.

I don't know what to say to that friend who recoiled at week January: Week 1, except it pays off.

I've done the LCW DVD 4 times, and it took off 2 of the lbs I gained back during my teacher conference week. It's worth it, not only because you'll look good but you'll feel good. Feel like you can achieve things you never thought possible. Things like:

  • running stairs for 45 minutes 3x a week
  • training for a running a 5K
  • going for a 4 hour walk
  • hiking all day long in Moab
  • doing mountain climbers
  • Zumba
  • fitting into size 10 jeans 
  • graduating at the top of your pole-dancing class
  • Doing a backflip on the trampoline at 30 years old (Don't believe me? I feel a videotape in the works.)
It's been a long hard journey. I don't expect it will ever be as easy as it was putting the weight on, but I'm not doing to die of obesity.

See you tonight, Jillian. Work out my glutes please. It's bathing suit season.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

The Nestle 5K

I just realized I never blogged about my 5K.
And not because I did poorly. Quite the opposite. I kicked my own trash.
Mumbledore celebrating his victory. And me pouting over my loss.

Still we felt pretty pumped after. Proud of our accomplishments.

I ran my little heart out and beat my last treadmill time by 4 minutes! Woot woot! I ran it in 32:30.
Unfortunately, my friend who ran with me ran it in 28:30, so I did lose against him.

Still it was an amazing experience, and I have plans to run the BIG FOOT run in Sept. too.

Of course the week after my run I went to that teacher conference and was nearly force fed crap. (I swear those 5 wontons and 2 egg rolls were shoved into my mouth, whilst a district rep smashed my jaws together. heh. heh.)

But despite the food dilemma, I had an awesome time shopping and hot-tubbing with my friend, Shan. To hint at how much fun it's not every day that you run into a gorgeous Frenchman in a hot tub whilst singing about show-tune about a brassiere. But Shan and me, that's how we roll.
Shan has also lost a lot of weight. We were comparing gams.
An old tradition with a new twist.

My new earrings that I bought on Historic 25th street in Ogden.
Eat your heart out Frenchman from Switzerland.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

No news is bad news

I'm reading a book called Half-Assed: A Weight Loss Memoir by Jennette Fulda. It's a brilliant sardonic autobiography of one woman's journey from weighing nearly 400 lbs to dropping more than 1/2 of her weight. Her metamorphosis is bumpy and beautiful. Fulda uses humor to juxtapose the seriousness of her situation. She peaked at 370lbs and faced a life-threatening surgery, but was fueled by the experience and started a weight loss blog called She used a 360 degree photo to chart her progress and to reel readers in. And for some reason, nothing is more fascinating than a large person who invites you to gawk at her weight loss.
Why do we gawk?
Smug superiority. (mean ppl suck.)
What ever the reason, Fulda's a brave toaster for allowing ppl to view her chronicles. I am so inspired by her story and struck by our similarities. One of my favorite nuggets of dieting knowledge is the "No news is bad news on a diet blog" idea.
Cuz it's the truth.
My truth.
I've gained 5 lbs in the last 2 weeks.
If I were going to reject my own accountability and blame everything else, I'd probably start with...
  1. The diet shake I tried. It was very filling and yummy, but at the end of the day when I got cravings, I endulged on (TRUE STORY) Wendy's burgers and fries, 4 doughnuts, and 4 slices of pizza (not all in one day). So, obviously it was not the diet drink. A diet anything needs support from the consumer.
  2. I had a speed scrabble party/BBQ where I had only one hot dog. Yay me, right. Don't get too excited. I also ate 9 oatmeal chocolate chip cookies.
  3. 5-day teacher conference. They fed us breakfast, lunch, and gave us a stipend for dinner. Also, the hotel provided breakfast. This bombardment of food combined with the stationary nature of teacher conferences made for a buffet of challenges. We had (and I've bolded the ones I ate) cookies, brownies, cheesecake, rice Krispies, scones, pasta, lasagna, burritos, breakfast burritos, sandwiches, eggs, yogurt, granola, bread, rice, lo mein, orange chicken, beef and broccoli, sweet and sour chicken, fortune cookies, egg rolls, wontons, orange juice, soda, diet soda, water, steak, sweet potatoes, rolls, cinnamon butter, carrots, salad, pork, chicken sandwiches, peanut m&m's, bugles, toffee peanuts, chocolate almonds, crystal light, banana, apples, muffins, waffles, special K bars, cereal, red vines, swedish fish, calamari, and pretzel bites with nacho cheese.
The blame game only works if there's validity to the claims.
I am responsible.
I am to blame.
I was not strong.
Food is the villain in my story. As protagonist, I should slay the dragon, not eat it. Fulda mentioned that there are foods she's powerless against. My culinary Voldemorts are peanut m&ms, lasagna, some breads, cookies, chocolate nuts, and Chinese food. If my life were a heroic tale, I'd be a tragic hero.
So I have a week.
A week of normalcy where I will try to regain my diet integrity. Try to change my story to a happy ending.
Heroes are flawed. When they come up against an opponent (like deep fried cream-cheese stuffed dough) and can't defeat it, they step back and restrategize before taking another approach.
Heroes have support too. If Buffy taught us anything, it's that Scoobies are a key component to kicking bad guys' butts.
Help me slay my dragon.
Boost me up, readers.
Because, I have a 4 week teaching conference week after next. It's the ultimate battle.The climax of a movie.

In a world of candy and chocolate armies, one girl stands alone in the face of premature death from diabetes or heart failure. Will her readers help her wield the sword at the pasta and Alfredo enemy?

My battle plan this week:
  • Last Chance Workout DVD 5 days a week
  • Count my cals 1200-1500
  • Post every day of my conference what I ate. 
Wish me luck. Buy tickets to the show.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

REDBOOK Treadmill Motivator

I like to cut out photos from REDBOOK and put em up on my treadmill to motivate me. Here's the latest version.

Hopefully my preparations and training for the 5K this Saturday will pay off. I haven't been able to shave off a whole minute yet, but I'm still trucking away. Also, I've been experiencing some back pain, so I'll need to see a chiropractor before the race.

Wish me luck.
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