Monday, September 5, 2011

New intel on Big Foot proves that he has a handlebar mustache

My 2 friends, Shan and Nicholette, and I went to Eden this weekend for the BIG FOOT Mid-Night Blood run 5K, my 2nd 5K ever. Held at Wolf Mountain ski resort, which in the middle of September is really dry and dusty, over 50 runners showed up to run/try to spot a costumed Sasquatch on the trail. We got a little turned around on the way up and ended up being 5 seconds late. The three of us (which was originally a group of 7, then 5, then 3 when WAY too many people flaked out. Punks.) had to hike up the hill to catch up with the runners, and did so by the third switchback.

On the BIG FOOT 5K. Not running so much as walking. It was a pretty steep "run". We hiked it.
Oh, I didn't mention the switchbacks? The whole trail was uphill on loose gravel and dust. Sure the foliage and trees were beautiful (OK, that's a full-on assumption. It was way too dark to really tell), but mostly we were focused on the dust we inhaled that was kicked up from the runners in front of us.

Hiking in the dark. Yes, I have two head lamps. Plus we were the last ones (b/c we were late) and you know what that means in the movies. The last ones always get picked off by the psychos...or in this case, big foots.
And by "runners" I mean walkers, because you try running up switchbacks in the dark while getting vertigo from your headlamp and the strobe-light effect of 75 other runners with headlights, and then throw in the fact that you're trying to spot a big foot, so the trail isn't always top priority.

Big Foot is walked behind me while the photo is being taken.
We did actually get to see one too. The advertisement for the run made it sound like they'd have like 5-10 costumed Big Foots?...Big Foot?...Big Feet?...hairy men on the path, hiding behind trees, poking heads out in curiosity here and there.

But here's what really happened. We saw a Big Foot on the second switchback, didn't see one for the whole rest of the run (Though, I did scare Shan pretty good with a shoulder grab and traditional "Boo". Wuss.) until the end of the run when we were almost back to the lodge at the base of the mountain, which is when we saw the same Sasquatch in ALMOST  THE SAME EXACT SPOT!
When the race ended, this Sasquatch/swamp monster showed up at the lodge in a weird camo Snuffleupagus costume. Plus, when he pulled the head off, the guy had a Tom Sellek handlebar mustache. Pretty unusual for a Big Foot, I hear.
I'm sure they got the Sasquatch costume from the Seasame Street wardrobe.

Lame.
Rick would've been disappointed with that. But he turned out to be one of the flaker-outers, so poo on him.
Scared of the Sasquatch. Nic has my back.

So, we don't know what time we made, nor did we get a tee, because they weren't free. You had to pay $25 for one.

Running up and down a ski lope for 3.1 miles in September makes for dusty shoes.
I'm still glad we went though. It was a killer hike.  My buttocks still ache a little when I walk up or down stairs.

Me and Sasquatch hanging.
Would I go again? Sure. I know what to expect this time, and the girls and I did have a ton of fun regardless of our unrequited expectations.



Plus, have you ever seen Rules of Engagement?
We tried our own version. Apparently, I'm the David Spade of the bunch, but I don't have a Tom Selleck mustache, so I win. 

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